I've been thinking more about the Ba'al Shem Tov's tips for perpetual growth - sowing tears and harvesting joy (though he really just focuses on the tears). I have been taught that one of the differences between Judaism and many eastern religions is that in Judaism there is no concept of becoming enlightened. In Judaism, there is a dynamic tension created between the world as it is and the world as it could be. We are always trying to find ways to do tikkun in the world, and, more importantly, on ourselves. The Ba'al Shem Tov is outlining one of the methods for using that tension to continue to grow.
(As a side note, the goal of all of this tikkun is to repair the world so that the messiah can come. My personal feeling is that when the messiah gets here, no one will notice. We will bring about the messianic age bit by bit and tear by tear. We repair the world slowly, as we repair ourselves gradually. There will be no huge event when the messiah comes, no great jump forward, he will just show up and, God willing, be like everyone else. The messiah is not a person who will come to save us, we will save ourselves and thus bring the messiah to us.)
I have been spending some time looking at my life and seeing the tensions that drive me forward. I am old enough to start seeing patterns in my behavior and to see that many issues in my life return after I thought I had dealt with them. I have changed my focus now in how I follow the patterns of my life. What I am looking for now is the tensions that create those issues. A clear example is my marriage. I can see the differences between my wife and I that create friction, but they also drive us to deepen and strengthen our relationship. Though the will probably never be resolved, they push us both forward to become better people.
I would suggest to everyone to take a moment and consider the recurrent issues in your lives, and then examine the tensions that create those issues. Are there tensions that create growth? Are there tensions that create self-destructive behavior? Are there tensions in which you get to choose a nourishing or a destructive path? The next step is to strengthen the tensions that force us to grow, and get out of the destructive ones. The goal is not to become enlightened, but to meet the tensions with wisdom and grow from them. To give power to those things which help us to do Tikkun, and take the power away from those things that lead us to Yetzer ha-Rah (evil inclination).
Thursday, November 27, 2008
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2 comments:
Can you give an example of a destructive tension?
The tensions I came across were between two extremes, either of which would be harmful, but the tension between the extremes would always pushed towards growth.
The case I was thinking of was between a couple I knew a few years ago who were headed for a divorce. The tension between them was such that she would say something harsh to him, expecting resistance, and he would just take it. So she would say something harsher because (for reasons unknown to me) she wanted him to react to her with anger. When he didn't, she got meaner until things just snapped. That's a good example of a negative feedback loop that led to really bad places.
Internally, you can use your example, but flip it on it's head. What if those two extremes caused a person to move towards self-destruction? The person has a belief that expressing anger is bad, so they try to suppress their anger. That makes the anger stronger, which makes the person push down harder. That's a bad tension in life.
It's basically when there is some tension between who we are internally or how we relate to others, that leads us towards self-destruction. Those are tensions that should be diffused, not encouraged.
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